In a surprise move, Miramax Films has announced a big-budget remake of Sweet Bread Productions' groundbreaking, genre-defying 2005 film "The Movie: A brainchild of two borderline schizophrenic college students compiling their mental bowel movements into one semi-cohesive collage of scenes about nothing (or So It Would Seem)".

Set to be released in time for the 10-year anniversary of the original, the film stars Hollywood power-duo Ben Affleck and Matt Damon as the troubled friends Vini and Ed, tormented by a dark secret and slowly losing their minds as they try desperately to find an open restaurant. Funding for the project was provided by Rupert Murdoch, who is in talks to acquire SBP entirely.


Full Cast
Vini: Ben Affleck
ED: Matt Damon
Chris: Jonah Hill
Brian: Adam Sandler
Duke: Jet Li
Chris' Buddy: Benicio del Toro
Chris' mom: Kathy Bates
Tony: Ryan Gosling
Kayne: Andy Serkis
Man Bitch: Hafþór Júlíus Björnsson.
Girl at Club: Mila Kunis
Maylin: Lucy Liu
Waiter: Paul Giamatti
Arnie: Edward Norton
Cop: John Cho